Monday, March 30, 2009

Proud Godmother

As I stated on Facebook, I am now a proud Godmother to Jeff and Candace's son, Oliver. His baptism was yesterday down in Canton, really close to our old house (which was kind of weird). Anyway, Brian was asked to be his godfather as well, which was really wonderful. We feel very honored to be asked to play an important role in his life.

Three children were being baptized yesterday, Ollie, a little girl about his age (6 months) and a tiny baby girl. All the families sat around the fount (the bird bath looking thing with the holy water in it) in a half circle. We were in the middle. Anyway, I've never been to a Catholic baptism before (just my friend K-Lo's very cool Mennonite baptism), so I had no clue what to do. But, the deacon was very nice and guided us through. Ollie was very cute in his little outfit, and behaved like a champ. When the deacon annointed his chest with oil, Ollie tried to bite his thumb. When the holy water was dumped on his head, he just had this startled look on his face, then when it was done, he squealed. And when his head was annointed with the other oil, he, again, just let out a squeal. Afterwards, there were many pictures taken, so I was careful yesterday to make sure I had good makeup and hair going so I'd look my best for Candace's pictures! Brian also looked snazzy in his blue button down and sport jacket. My husband is CUTE.

After the ceremony, we went to Jeff's parents' house for a family party. The men spent most of their time watching the State game (go MSU!). The ladies sat around and chatted (mostly about babies and kids) and Candace opened Ollie's gifts. You know, a typical family style party. The food and cake were delicious, and we appreciate the Meese's having us in their home. Again, we truly appreciate and are honored by the fact that we were asked to have that role in Oliver's life.

As a side note, Brian was completely in his element yesterday at the church and during the ceremony. Me not being Catholic (or anything, really) I had no idea what to expect, and it was a cake walk for him. He knew every prayer and exactly what to do and obviously felt really comfortable. It's strange for me to see him in that light, because he's never really gone to Mass or been involved in his church the entire time we've been together. But its the same feeling I get when we travel together and we go in cathedrals, and he stops and crosses himself in the holy water. It's weird for me, but natural for him. So, quite honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he becomes a church goer again...

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Nada, Zippo, Zilch

Since we've gotten back from Florida, I've had nada, zippo, zilch to do. Especially this week. Work is slow, slow, slow, the house is clean, and it's not exactly warm enough to do real yard work yet. I wish I had actual, paying work to do, but, alas, no. Which, quite frankly, I do not understand.

Almost two weeks ago, I had this big phone call with the head partner, in which he proceeded to tell me how busy they are, and they have "125 hours a month of research and writing work for me to do, if I want it." Then, he proceeds to state, "We don't really care about your personal situation nor do we need to know what it is, we just need to know if you want to work, and if so how much." (They don't even know what my personal situation is, for pity's sake. All they know is that I had to have some time off. Way to be a jerk.) He told me to take some time and think about it, and get back to them. The very next day, I emailed him and the other attorney I deal with a lot and told them specifically that I was ready and able to work, and exactly how much work I was wanting. Since they were so busy, I was thinking I'd get work last week.

Nope. As I said earlier, nada, zippo, zilch. Earlier today, I sent them a very nice email, checking status. I have not heard back yet. It's really frustrating. If they've decided they don't want to "deal with me" anymore because of my "personal situation," fine, whatever. If that's the case, just let me know so I can move on. If not, give a girl some damn work! I'm starting to wish I had just gotten a job in retail when we moved out here a year and a half ago, but oh well. And the sucky thing is that those jobs are all filled right now because retail is so bad! So I'm a bit stuck!

I'll keep you up on what's going on. But until then, I guess I'll go continue reading "Atlas Shrugged."

Monday, March 16, 2009

No Needles for Me, No Sir

Brian and I had another appointment today at the special baby making doctor's office. Before we went on vacation, I had several tests run, and I just needed in my own head to talk it through with the doc a little more before we jumped back into anything. All the tests he had run turned out well, which makes things even more frustrating (trust me, when you deal with a situation like this, you want them to find something wrong, just so you have some certainty). I know I talked a bit in a previous post about heparin, which is a blood thinner. The doc doesn't think I need it, but I sort of think I do. And that's what I wanted to talk about today a little more.

We started off first discussing why he wants to give me Clomid (which stimulates the ovaries) when I have no flipping trouble getting pregnant. He stated the Clomid would be to optimize conditions at ovulation, keeping good hormone levels high, and making things best as possible for embryo implantation. But he also said, if I don't want to do it, its my choice. He feels its just one thing that may up my chances a little and won't hurt (other than slightly increasing my chances of having twins--they do monitor you to help prevent that). Okay, I understand that, and I totally appreciate the fact that he's not pushing it.

Then, we moved on to discussing heparin, the blood thinner shots. Again, certain enzyme levels I have are good, and my clotting times are good, which would indicate that I don't need the heparin despite having the gene mutation. However, its hard to trust what's being told to you when you have numerous women on message boards telling you that you "absolutely have to have it and I cannot believe your doctor will not give it to you! Mine gave it to me without question! I would absolutely get a second opinion!" We discussed this at length.

I asked him if he doesn't feel I need it and neither do a lot of other women, why are so many doctors giving it to their patients? He stated that 1) he feels that many doctors just don't understand the literature regarding its usefulness, or in his opinion, lack thereof 2) many women are given it simply to shut them up (i.e., the squeaky wheel gets oiled) and 3) the risk of complications from it is relatively low, so a lot of people use it just for the hell of it. Here are my feelings on those responses. 1) This doc is really smart, and really seems like he knows what he's doing, so I can believe that--people can read medical literature in whatever way they want to suit their agenda. 2) I can also buy that argument--that a doc would give somebody a drug just to shut them up and make them go away. 3) Even going in there as a patient asking for it, I understand the risk is small, but real, so I appreciate that the doc's priority is to see no harm comes to me. He also said that if I did get pregnant and any test result came back weird or anything happened that made him think heparin would be helpful, he would certainly prescribe it then. It's something that you only need once you're pregnant, typically.

Also, I have noticed increased bruising just from being on the baby aspirin I'm on, so it does make me nervous to use the heparin. I gave myself a horrible bruise lately simply banging my leg on a stadium seat in Florida--this thing is the size of a softball and will probably take several weeks to heal. And it didn't even hurt very much when I did it, at the time I thought nothing of it. That is another indication that I 1) have thin enough blood as it is and don't need the heparin and 2) giving me the heparin could be potentially very dangerous. If I were on the heparin and did that to myself, I could possibly bleed out and die. Seriously. I mean that risk is very, very small, but I specifically asked Brian if it would be worth it to him, and he said no. The doc said he'd give it to me if I insisted, but that huge bruise freaks me out big time. So, I think I probably won't do it. I guess in the end, I'd rather be alive than have a baby.


So, that's what up. The doc said take some time and figure out what we want to do and when, and then give him a call. He also said that if we did decide on adoption instead, they could help us with resources. He, himself, is on an advisory board that helps encourage adoption. So, if that's the route we take, we have a little help there too (on top of all the other help that friends have offered). Honestly, I can't do this many more times, so fairly soon, this will be over one way or the other (either we have a baby, or I have another loss and we move on for good). That'll be the day I hope for--when our lives are back to normal and all this bullshit is done.

Monday, March 9, 2009

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E! (and Tigers too!)

Sorry, I didn't blog in Florida, but I didn't have my computer with me (Brian had his). Also, sorry there's not pictures to be had, but they're on the camera still and not on my hard drive. :)

We got back yesterday from Florida and had a great time! We left Saturday the 28th, and went straight to Disney. We were lucky and got our room right away, so we dropped off some of our stuff and went to the Magic Kingdom! Brian's eyes lit up as we saw everything Disney. The weather was great that day and we had fun walking around and riding rides (although I don't do roller coasters). Later that night, we went to the Cirque de Soleil show "La Nouba", which is only in Downtown Disney, which is just a big place with bars, restaurants and stores that's owned by Disney. She show was awesome, and we both really enjoyed it. We then went and collapsed at our room at the Fort Orleans Riverside resort (a really nice place, BTW, I would recommend).

The next day was rainy and nasty, but we did Epcot anyway. We didn't get to see everything we wanted to because we had a dinner reservation that night at the German Biergarten in the World Showcase at Epcot. It was awesome and sort of like being in Munich all over again, but not quite. :) Also, we stayed for the fireworks show that they do over the big lake. Very awesome! Monday, we did the Animal Kingdom (more for the kiddies, we think) and went back to Epcot to finish a few things out and have dinner.

Tuesday, we fulfilled another of Brian's childhood dreams by going to Lakeland to see our beloved Tigers in spring training. It was really bizarre, as the Tigers were playing team Venezuela in an exhibit for the World Baseball Classic, and 4 of our major players were playing for their country, and thus, playing against their own team. But, the Tigers beat Team Venezuela that day, so all was well. Wednesday, we went to Disney Hollywood Studios and stayed for the fireworks show they have there, which was very good, and I again, would recommend.

Thursday, we left Disney and went to Port St. Lucie on the east side of the state to stay with our friends Steve and Nancy for the third year in a row. They live in PGA Village, which is a big golf resort complex that is gated, etc. We hung out, went to old school Florida bars, and saw another ball game at Tradition Field, which is where the Mets train. Nancy fed us awesome food and the boys geeked it up on their computers for 3 days. We had a very nice time.

All in all, a very nice week! Maybe the best vacation we've ever taken, because it was such low stress!