"A Long December..."

"And there's reason to believe, maybe this year will be, better than the last..."

Sorry, I had to quote the Counting Crows, because this month is seeming to drag a bit here at the end, and also, because I heard that song the other day and it always makes me feel contemplative. Although, I must say, the words don't exactly fit my life, as, overall, 2009 wasn't a bad year, much better than 2008, in fact. New Year's Eve is here tomorrow, and I think 2010 is probably going to rock.

Here's the Christmas recap. We went to Bill and Dena's Christmas Eve and spent the night. Brian made his traditional Christmas Eve dinner of homemade pizza, which always goes over well. It was quiet this year, as Erin and her brood and Ryan, Jen and Kelsey were not there for dinner. Not that I'm complaining. Quiet was nice. We got up Christmas morning and Brian made omeletes for everyone, along with toast and potatoes. I was the toast girl this year, as Brian's normal helper, Ryan, was with Jen's family that morning. (They arrived later for breakfast.) We then did gifts, and the kids really seemed to enjoy what we got them. Then, Erin's brood and Ryan and Jen left again, and we had Christmas dinner cooked by Bill. Then, we went to my folks, and hung out with them for the night, which is always fun.

The next day, we had Tompkins family Christmas at my Grandpa and Grandma's. Grandpa is still doing well, which is nice to see. Grandma has lost a little weight, which is good for her sugar and also nice to see. The 17 of us demolished a turkey and a ham, and had WAY too much dessert. Then, we did gifts, which was fun, especially to watch Emma and Nolan open their stuff and go nuts. It's weird that they're the only kids present anymore! Then, the night dissolved into a raucous games of "Apples to Apples," which I didn't play because I'm not very good at it, honestly. :)

We came home that night, and since then, we've been hanging out. John and Erica came over one night, and we're heading to their house in Chi-town on New Year's Day for the weekend. Yay! Tomorrow night, we're going to our friends the Barlow's, who invited us over months ago. The Meese-doggies are also going, should be a good night. Also, since Brian's and my Bose DVD player took a crapper about 6 months ago, we went and bought a Blu-Ray player that is awesome and live streams our Netflix. I t hen sweet talked Bose into giving us a deal to trade in the old player for new equipment, but this time we're just going with the media center, and not the whole media center with DVD. Honestly, their audio systems are awesome, but their video isn't great, and they refuse to upgrade it to Blu-Ray. So, we'll have the surround sound still, but a separate Blu-Ray, which is fine. The new media center has so many component spots to plug into, we'll be able to play Wii in surround if we want! This excites me, as Brian and I are spoiled and we do like our electronic equipment and gadgets. I mean, its a luxury and I could easily live without it if I have to, but I DON'T have to, so I might as well enjoy. :)

Happy 2010!!!

Our Dossier is on it's Way!

We have reached a very important milestone with the adoption! Our dossier is finally out of our hands and will be going to Russia in a few short days! This morning I emailed our consultant about our papers, and she apologized and said she'd emailed me on Friday and said they were good! We have no idea why I didn't get that email, but the upshot is that I went to Lansing late this morning and got everything apostilled (29 documents, 29 bucks, took about 29 minutes). Before they could apostille them, I had to run and make copies at a nearby copy shop. I wasn't aware that the apostille is a piece of paper and gold sticker seal they permanently affix to each document. You can't copy your document after. So, I should have make those copies at home before I left, but you live and learn! In the grand scheme of everything, $5 is not a lot of extra money!

After I got everything apostilled, I came home and ate my lunch and went to Fed Ex and sent all the papers overnight to our consultant in Grand Rapids. So, in the next few days, our file should go to Russia!!! It takes about 3-4 weeks for everything to get translated and certified, especially at this time of year. Russia celebrates New Years just like we do, but their Christmas is Orthodox Christmas, which is later, and is on January 7. Literally, everything is closed, all offices, etc, from December 31-January 10 for holiday. So, that may take longer than usual, but at least it's out of our hands. Depending on what the agency's Russia office thinks is best, we may register in a particular region, but we may not, as not all regions require registration. If they don't register us in a region, we go in the master pile, I guess, with all the other families who are also not registered in one particular region.

So now basically, the wait is on. They are telling us we may wait a year for a referral because we are wanting two very young children, but that's okay. We'll see how it goes. I have to think that perhaps not as many people are adopting right now because of the economy, so maybe that'll shorten our wait. (Hoping!) And there are tons of other things to do while we wait, some more paperwork, gather orphanage donations, learns some Russian phrases, find a special doctor to help us evaluate the children's health when the time comes, and others. So, we'll still be really busy! But its nothing that will hold up our timetable! We are so excited to be at this point, and plan on taking a break from this stuff until after the New Year! We've been, and will continue to be, so wrapped up in all this, a break for the holidays will be great.

Thank you everyone!

Just Waiting!

So, I just wanted to do a quick update about adoption stuff. We have our home study in hand, and, on Friday, got all our documents signed and notarized! We came home and I immediately faxed one copy of everything to our consultant in Grand Rapids for her review. I am literally just waiting to get an email back from her saying the papers all look good. Once I get that, I can head to Lansing and have them apostilled, which is a state certification of the notary (as in, the state saying this person who notarized the documents is truly a notary). Once they are apostilled, I can Fed Ex all the papers and a big fat check off to our consultant and then, THEY GET SENT TO RUSSIA!!! So, we are almost to a big milestone!!

Thanks for reading and caring!

Turkey Day Post-Mortem

So, Thanksgiving ended up going fine, although hosting duties did stress me out a bit, as usual! We ended up with 16 adults and 4 little girls, counting us. Luckily between the kitchen, dining room and in front of the TV (for the football junkies), the house could handle it all. We had a nearly 19 pound turkey, and didn't have that many leftovers! Brian normally likes having a LOT of leftovers (the man can hoover turkey sandwiches), but we ended up being busy for a lot of the weekend, and then he left for work out of town on Monday. So, not many leftovers for him this year.

The day started off well, with Brian making his stuffing and getting the turkey in at 10 am. Dinner was supposed to be at 2. He put the turkey on to roast at 325 degrees. I told him about halfway through (or maybe even earlier) to crank it up to 350, but he didn't. Oh no, he waited until it was 1:30 and the timer hadn't popped yet! Too late!!! The other funny thing is that my cousins Cory and Kayla were coming from Lake Orion, and got totally lost. I think they ended up half way to South Lyon. Kayla didn't write down the directions properly, and they ended up going in the wrong direction. They finally turned back towards town and make it at about 1:30, when they should have been here about 12:30 or 1 probably. Silly college kids!

So, it's 2 o'clock and everyone is waiting around to eat. The timer on that damn turkey FINALLY popped at like 2:15, so we didn't eat until 2:30 and everyone was STARVING!! But it was worth it, as Brian makes delicious turkey. We also had mashed potatoes, corn, stuffing, green bean casserole, squash, cranberry jelly, and rolls. For dessert, we had pumpkin pie, my mother's famous pumpkin cheesecake, and pumpkin roll (which was delicious). My cousin Kayla is currently a vegetarian (for the last couple years, actually) and the only thing she and Brian can agree on is my Mom's pumpkin cheesecake! They both said it was the best one she ever made!

Cory and Kayla ended up staying until about 9:30 that night, just hanging out. We made Kayla watch the original Star Trek: The Motion Picture (ha ha!) and she fell asleep in the chair! Then, the Wrath of Khan came on, so we just kept watching! It was funny. I'm glad they had a good time. All in all, we had a good time with the holiday too, even though it was a bit crazy!

Thanksgiving (aka Thanks-bitching)

Brian and I are hosting Thanksgiving (aka Thanks-bitching, Brian's word!) this year, our first major holiday hosting since Easter 2008. (My birthday party this year, while huge, doesn't count as a major holiday, unfortunately.) We're expecting at least 14 adults and 1 child, possibly a few more, as one of Brian's sisters has yet to tell us if her brood is coming. Rude. :(

Anyway, hosting major events stresses me out. Well, the preparation stresses me out, the actual hosting part is fun. Once all the food is done and eaten, I really enjoy myself. As for the preparation, we're right in the middle of it. I did the shopping today, and gosh, I do not miss working at Meijer on days like those, because pretty much everybody else was shopping at Meijer, too. I had to buy potatoes, squash, stuffing supplies, etc. I already have a green bean casserole from GFS (they have all sorts of pre-made sides, check it out!), frozen corn from the Schwan's Man, and I'm picking up our fresh 16-18 pound turkey from Middletown Market (the same place Brian gets his deer processed) on Tuesday. Other folks are kindly bringing cranberries, rolls, and delicious desserts. It should end up being fan-tastic. Thank god Brian does the turkey and stuffing, and does it well, and I can concentrate on the sides.

I expect the day to go well, as our families generally get along well. Dinner is at 2 pm, so it'll be all about getting up in the morning and getting the turkey going and peeling potatoes (not fun for me at all!). It's on days like these having a big ass dining room table rocks, because when it has the leaf in it, it seats 10 people, then 4-6 more can go around the kitchen table and some will probably just want to sit in front of the TV anyway. Thank god we have enough space!

So, now that you all know exactly what WE'LL be eating on T-day, I'm off to thinking about starting dinner for tonight! I hope you all have a great Thanks-bitching!

More Adoption Fun!

Hi All! Sorry that I haven't been blogging much lately, and when I have it's been all adoption, all the time. But, between that and work, that's pretty much all we've been doing lately! Brian's travel has been all over the place, and now its hunting for him later this week, so I'll be flying solo again for a while!

I wanted to write and update what's been going on with the adoption, since everyone has been so kind, and so interested. A lot's been going on with it, and its all been going pretty well!

1) Today we had our home visit. That's when the home study social worker, (Kris in our case), comes to the house and checks it out. (Probably to make sure you're not lying about where you live!) We also went over a few last things. She loved the house and thought it was great, and will be a great place for kids. We told her that's pretty much why we had bought it! She stayed for about an hour and a half, and we had a nice visit. She is SUPER nice, and I would honestly recommend her and Adoption Associates in general for anyone who is interested. The process has been overall smooth so far, with a minor bump here and there, but that's to be expected.

2) We had our psychological evaluation last a week and a half ago, and actually got the reports (one for me and one for Brian) in the mail today. I was so nerve wracked about it, but the reports are good! We were "Recommended!" Yay!

3) We have one last thing to do for our required education, and that'll be done tomorrow. We're attending a seminar in Lansing on Attachment Disorder. It's sort of presenting a worse case scenario with an adoption, which I think is good. We need to be prepared for the worst, and hope for the best. Once that is done, we're done with classes, and then the home study can be complete!

4) Once the home study is complete, I can send that along with some other additional paperwork they asked for to USCIS (United Stated Citizenship and Immigration Service), ie, the Department of Homeland Security. Gotta despise federal bureaucracy, but they hold the power to award us visas to allow our children to come home with us when the time comes. Also, when the home study is done, we can complete the dossier paperwork (99% done already), get it notarized (I'll need to make an appointment at the bank, because it's about 3 copies of 8 different docs and will take a while), and then apostilled (which is the state seal, so I'll have to drive to Lansing). After that, OUR DOSSIER GOES TO RUSSIA! We had planned to have this paperwork done by the end of the year, and I think, barring major emergency, that we definitely will! Once everything is sent, we can start doing other things, like contacting an MD who's an adoption specialist (more on that in a later post), learning some Russian, getting rooms ready, gathering orphanage gifts, and working on yet more paperwork. It will be CONSTANT stuff to do until we're done, but we're almost over the first hurdle!

5) On a final note, our neighbors 3 doors down, Dawn and Rob, are in Russia RIGHT NOW meeting their daughter for the first time. And they just LOVE her and wish they could bring her home immediately, but obviously they have to wait just like we will. But, seeing her blog and how happy they are, for me, completely validates everything we are doing even more! I can't wait until that's us, but we have to be patient, because we could wait awhile!

Late October...Feels like November Still!

I haven't written in a while, and that's because not much has been going on, or rather, the same old, same old has been happening. Obviously, we're still plugging away with the adoption. We still hope to have the paperwork out by the end of year, but I think it'll be sooner. I think that's good--if you're going to have to wait in line a long time, you'd rather be at the front of the line than at the back, right?

Regarding the adoption, we've finished our educational classes except for a seminar we're going to attend, and Brian has a book to read called, "Parenting with Love and Logic." I guess its a pretty famous book that lots of people have read. And its a book not just for adoptive parents, but for all parents. I think a lot of that stuff is pure hooey, but I honestly really liked that one. It's not all touchy-feeling, befriend your children crap. It actually says that you're NOT supposed to be their friends, you're supposed to be their parents. Also, it really focuses on letting kids learn from their own mistakes, and not fixing their problems for them. Sounds about right to me. The seminar we're attending is on Attachment and Bonding and what sorts of attachment problems adoptive children can have. I'm sure it'll be scary, but enlightening. Of course, they're telling you the worst case scenarios, we must remember that.

Also, Brian is thrilled that he got his first deer with a bow. Yay Brian, good job honey! It was a small doe, and normally I think he would have let her go, but he really just wanted to get over that hurdle. We still have some meat left from last year (almost gone), so he gave the whole deer to his sister, Erin, who could really use the meat and will happily eat every last bit of it. So, its not going to waste, thankfully. He's also been looking into how to donate deer to food programs, but I don't know if he's figured it out yet.

Brian has also been very good about keeping up with his physical therapy at home work for his shoulders. His actual therapy is done, and now he has exercises to do at home that he'll probably have to do forever. He's being very compliant, I think. His strength is increasing like crazy and he's getting some guns on him from the weight work! Another gold star babe!

Other than that, I've just been working a lot again, which is good. Considering we have to pay $350 this Friday for a psych evaluation that will probably take 2 hours, I'll take every penny. That's another thing that kills me about this process--you'd think we were wanting to do espionage or something with as much stuff as the government is making us do. And, just to be clear, its not just us, its everybody that goes through this process. Seriously, Immigration people--go round up some illegals or terrorists or something and leave all us adoptive parents who just want to give kids good homes alone! :)

More later!

Early October...it feels like November

Oh my gosh, it went from summer to late fall, it seems. I hate this weather! It is so cold and rainy and crappy! I would love to have an Indian summer, since we had our first hard frost the other night, but since we never had a REAL summer to begin with, an Indian one is probably more than I can realistically expect. :)

Just an update on what's happening around here, after the great MSU victory over U of M. Brian's mother had her whole ankle reconstructed about 10 days ago--she's basically been walking around on a broken ankle for THIRTY years. Literally. She fell and broke it when my sister in law Jaimie was about a month or two old, and its never been taken care of properly. So, we've been trying to keep up with what's going on there, and being available if they need anything. I think she's already starting to feel a bit better, as she's been on her email quite a bit.

My work starts up again in earnest on Tuesday. I'll be working probably 4 days a week or so through Thanksgiving. With what an adoption costs, money is good, but I will be smoking busy! So, on days off and on weekends, we will be really busy with paperwork and educational classes. I'm actually sort of looking forward to the classes, most of you who know me well know that I've always loved school. So that'll be fun, I think. It's basically on line stuff, and one seminar on attachment that Brian wants to attend. We have 7 different units, for a minimum of 12 hours of classwork we have to do to meet the requirements. It shouldn't be a problem, its just a matter of sitting down and doing it! Hmmmm, maybe EVERYBODY that's wanting a baby or that is pregnant should have to take some damn parenting classes...

I also just want to say how lucky I feel that we have family and friends that are being so supportive of our decision to adopt. We truly have come to feel as though this is the route we're supposed to take to become parents. We will be saving two little lives in the process. To get back to the wonderful support we're getting, I'll sign off this blog entry with something Candace sent me recently. I hope its okay with her I'm posting it here. She sent me this picture with the caption of:

"Hi Miss Heather & Mr. Brian! I'm ready for my Russian friends to join me in my new ride!"

Adoption Journey!

So, many of you may already know this, but Brian and I have officially started on an adoption journey. We have begun the process to adopt from Russia! We are so excited about it, but also a little daunted, for reasons I'll discuss below. Anyway, we just decided that we'd had enough of trying to have a biological baby. Three miscarriages and fertility treatment since the beginning of the year with no results is enough. It's funny, with the fertility treatment, the more intervention they did, the less pregnant I seemed to get. And it just seemed like the treatment caused a whole other set of problems that needed further treatment, etc. Where does it end? At the end of July, shortly before we went up to the UP, we just decided, nope, no more. And it is a huge weight lifted off our shoulders.

In case you are wondering, here is a brief outline of the process, which is why we feel daunted. There are 3 different sets of paperwork to do. The home study, the dossier, and the USCIS paperwork. The home study is working with a social worker here, having meetings with her, and doing an educational component. We can hopefully get that done in about 2 months. The home study goes in both the dossier, which is the file that gets sent to Russia, and the USCIS paperwork (USCIS is the United States Custom and Immigration). The dossier literally consists of about 20 different documents, like original birth certificates, marriages license, the deed to our house, fingerprint checks, etc that we have to gather, have notarized and some state sealed in Lansing. I am going to be doing A LOT of running around. And the customs paperwork is sort of similar, some the same info, with some additional documents. Yikes!

After all that paperwork is done, our dossier is submitted to Russia to be translated and registered in a region. Then, the waiting begins. We could wait a year for a referral for a child or children (we are thinking of adopting 2 kids at once) that match your criteria as far as age, gender, etc. We hopefully will not wait that long! A referral includes some medical information, and perhaps a photos. Before deciding anything, you take that medical to a doctor who specializes in this stuff, and they give you an assessment whether they think the child has serious health issues. Then you decide if you want to accept the referral. Quickly after that, you travel to Russia for the first time to meet the child. You meet the child at the orphanage, and decide for good if you want them. If you do, you fly home after a week, and wait for a court date in Russia 2-3 months in the future. Then, you go back, have your court hearing, and the kids are yours after a waiting period. You can then go to the Embassy in Moscow, and you get permission from the US government to come home, and paperwork making the kids American citizens. Then, you are home with your child!

So, Brian and I will be making at least 2 trips to Russia in the next year or two. We are kind of hoping we can be done and home by next Christmas, but that's just sort of something we have in our head, nothing is set in stone with any of this. This is clearly not an easy or quick process, but like I said, we are so excited! For those of you to whom we've already told this, thanks for your support and enthusiasm. We appreciate it, and we're going to need your support in the coming months so we don't get discouraged!

Back to School...I Wish

So, it's September, and all the kids (college and younger!) are back in school. I cannot believe how quickly this non-summer summer we had passed. It's completely ridiculous. It's only September 10, and the leaves on the trees are already starting to turn colors. Ugh. I am so not ready for fall. Not that fall is bad, but fall leads to winter, which leads to snow and cold...you see where I'm going with this.

Anyway, back to "back to school." This time of year always makes me nostalgic for school days. It's been 5 years since I graduated law school, but I still feel like I should be going back to school this time of year. I honestly just love school; I'm such a nerd to the core. I love buying school supplies--the pens, pencils, paper and notebooks. Once I hit college and law school, I loved going to the bookstore and buying all my books for class, and all the highlighters and paper flags I would ever need (although I didn't like the bill!). I loved organizing my notebooks for class--in law school I had a very organized system, consisting of a huge 3 ring binder in which I kept all my notes for classes, organized chronologically, i.e., the first class I had Monday morning was first in the book, the second class of the week was next, and on down. At the time, I was very proud of this system, but now I realize it was dangerous--what if I lost that notebook and all my notes were gone? That would have been deadly.

Buying supplies and organizing was just one reason to love back to school--the other reason truly was the school part. I LOVE going and sitting in class (I always went to the front left of the classroom--I still do even when doing my exercise classes). I LOVE listening, taking notes, and raising my hand to talk, even if I am a bit like Horshack from "Welcome Back Kotter." ("Oooh-oooh-oooooh!" while raising hand vigorously.) Or, to give another example for those not familiar with "Welcome Back Kotter," see also Hermione Granger from the Harry Potter series. (God, I see so much of myself in that character!) I am such a nerd to the core, and truly in my heart, feel like school is the thing in the world I'm best at. I've never been as good at any job as I am at attending school. Unfortunately, being a professional student does the opposite of providing a pay check, but if I had the money, the first thing I'd do is enroll in classes again. I'd get a Masters in something like Political Science (my undergrad major) or even in English Lit (my minor). And when that was done, I'd move on to something else!

I know I'm probably nuts, and most of you reading this could not be more glad to not have to go to class. So, if any of my readers out there ARE actually going back to class, enjoy it and know there's at least one person who'd love to trade places with you. :)

August Update

So, I appear to do a lot of update posts lately. Maybe I'm having trouble with longer posts, or maybe its just a lot of little things are happening, as opposed to big things. that are good for writing long posts. Either way, I guess a short post is better than no post!

1) The weekend we got back from the UP, B-Nutt went on his annual camping sojourn with his buddies. I'm always glad when that's done for the year, because its such a hassle on our end. It shouldn't stress me out, because I have nothing to do with it, but it totally does. Brian cooks every year, and so there's always tons of food and drink laying around, we make numerous trips shopping, etc. Aack! The only reason I tolerate it is because he enjoys doing it so much.

2) The weekend after camping, we and the Meese's went to Chicago to visit the Fontana's. We went for the Air Show (which the girls ended up not going to anyway!), but mainly to attend Erica's "retirement" party. Haha! That made me laugh (Erica "retired" to being a stay at home mom). But it was really good to see John, Erica and the kids, and they are doing tons of great things to their house. And Dominic and Lia are about some of the cutest kids ever. Always a good time and loved the road trip with the Meese's. I think Candace was amazed at how funny Brian is in the car for long periods of time!

3) My work is in full swing again and so is Brian's. So, he's traveling a lot the last few weeks and coming up in the future. I've been in Saginaw a ton, so putting a ton of miles on my car (thank god for mileage reimbursement). But it looks like Thursday Candace and I will be hanging out and having fun, so that's good!

4) Finally, Brian and I are still figuring out what route we want to take, adoption wise. We have a pretty good idea what we'll be doing, but I'm not ready to make any official announcement yet. When I am, I will. :)

Later!

UP Trip Part Two

As the rain falls in buckets outside my window this morning, and before I go to yoga class, I decided to write up Part Two of the UP trip. Here goes!

On Saturday, as the rain was falling in Grand Marais, Brian and I took off to drive to the Keweenaw Peninsula. Drive time was about 4 and a half hours plus time to stop. We drove across US 41, through the edge of Munising, Marquette (looks pretty), Ishpeming and Nagaunee (both nice little towns on the water). We stopped in Ishpeming and had lunch at their brewery there and Brian bought a growler to bring home (of course). We got to our inn in Laurium/Calumet at about 2:30. We stayed at the Laurium Manor Inn, which is this huge old mansion built in 1908 by a copper baron. All the rooms are different, and you learn about the history of your room when you're there. We stayed in the Hecla room, which was the bedroom of the family's oldest son, Calvin. I picked this room out because of the mural of deer and elk on the walls. If you're interested, check it out.

http://www.laurium.info/

I would highly recommend if it you stay up in that area! It was so gorgeous and a full buffet breakfast was included every morning! They also have a B&B across the street, and two weekly rental cottages for groups that do not include breakfast. Totally awesome!

Saturday night, we drove back to Hancock and went to Mary and Ted's house. Brian got to meet them, as he never had before. And he also got to meet their little girl Elaine, who is still cute as a button. We hung out at their house for a while, chatting, and then went to dinner at a place in Houghton (just across the portage from Hancock) called the Library Pub. Again, a brew pub (does it sound like my husband likes beer?). We left Mary and Ted's and went back to the inn and collapsed. It was so nice sleeping in a real bed after sleeping in a tent for 3 days!

Sunday we decided to go to Copper Harbor and Eagle Harbor. We drove up US 41, a twisty, turny road in that area, and made it to Ft. Wilkins at Copper Harbor. Ft. Wilkins is a state park, an old army post from the 1840s that's all redone to be authentic with displays and things. They also have kids from Northern dress up and act the parts of servicemen, etc. It was really neat! After Ft. Wilkins, we headed into Copper Harbor itself and found the infamous Harbor House, which is a German restaurant right on the water where the ladies dress up in outfits and go dance on the dock if the boat from Isle Royale comes in. (We did not see this!) We took pictures of the lighthouse, but didn't actually go to it, because it was an expensive boat ride to get over there.

Next, we headed to Eagle Harbor, but went the long way around. We drove to the top of Brockway Mountain and took awesome pictures of Copper Harbor from up there. On the mountain, we ran into Mary and Ted, a big coincidence and planned again to meet for dinner! Brian kept saying at the top of the mountain that it didn't seem to him we were in Michigan, and that this was as pretty as anything he'd seen in Europe. I agree.

We then went to Eagle Harbor, which has a lighthouse and a little museum, but all in all, we think it wasn't what it was cracked up to be. Then, we went to the old Quincy Copper Mine and did the full tour, including underground. The Keweenaw used to be big mining country, and there are tons of old mines that you can tour. It was really neat, but a little unnerving to be 374 feet underground, especially when the tour kid turned off the lights and showed us how the miners worked by candlelight. Yikes!

That night, we had dinner with Mary, Ted, and Elaine at the Hut Inn, a local landmark. A nice time was had by all, I think. Monday morning, we got up, had breakfast, and headed out at about 8:45. We got home at about 6:30 and stopped for only 45 minutes--a total of 9 hours of driving time! What a long day! But it was a great trip!

Here are some more pictures. This one is of the snow stick on the way to Copper Harbor. Yes, that does read a record snowfall of over 30 feet the year I was born. If you can read it, the average is about 20 feet! We get about an average of 4 feet and complain about it!

Next, we have a view of the Copper Harbor lighthouse. We took this from a scenic overlook that's part of the State Park. Maybe next time we'll take the boat ride over.

Finally, we have a pic of Brian on the top of Brockway Mountain. It is gorgeous up there, and you can see all the old growth forest below.

UP Trip Part One

So, we are back from our trip to the UP. We left last Wednesday and got home Monday night. We had so much to do yesterday to catch up! But today I have a few minutes to sit down and post some stuff here about the trip. I'll do the first part today and then the second part in the next few days!

Wednesday morning we left and headed up to Grand Marais to camp with my aunt and uncle, Marty and Margaret, and my cousins Nolan and Emma. Margaret's mom Jan was also there, and a whole bunch of friends of Marty and Margarets'. After a 6 hour drive (plus stopping time), we got to the campground late in the afternoon and set up the tent. It was my first time tent camping, and it was fine for 3 nights. I could maybe handle one more night and that's about it! And we were lucky not to have any true inclement weather! Anyway, the campground was right on Lake Superior, and the views were awesome. What a pretty place!

On Thursday, we traveled around with Margaret and the kids and her mom and friends to 4 different sets of falls in the area, and got great pictures. We also had pasties at Muldoon's in Munising. Pasties are good, but I've had my fill of them for awhile! Friday, Brian and I went on a trip to Whitefish Point/Paradise to go to the Shipwreck Museum. We saw the bell off the Edmund Fitzgerald and spoke to a man who was on board the Arthur Anderson (the ship right behind the Fitz) that day. He said it was the worst storms he's ever seen in his life, and talked a lot with Brian about that terrible day. Then, we had fish and chips lunch at the Fish Haus in Paradise. Best fish I've ever had, fresh caught out of the lake that day! Then, we headed to both Upper and Lower Tahquamenon Falls. Totally awesome! We had dinner that night at the brew pub in Grand Marais, which has good pizza and beer.

Here are some pics. The first one is of the sunset off the break wall in Grand Marais. Margaret took this picture with our camera. Amazing.



This picture is of Wagner Falls, outside of Munising. There are tons of neat falls in that general area if you go. Also, Pictured Rocks are there, which we were not able to see. So, we've decided we must go back!



Finally, we have a picture Brian took at Lower Tahquamenon Falls. Both the upper and lower are awesome and you can actually hike the 4 miles in between the two parks! Of course, you either have to then hike back to your car, have someone there to pick you up, or pay an outrageous $9 a person for a shuttle that takes you back. Someday!

Latest Happenings, and Happenings to be...

Man, I haven't written here very much lately! So sorry to anyone who actually reads this thing! The thing is that I just haven't had a ton going on lately. Here's a rundown of things that have happened and things to come.

1) Got the carpets cleaned on Monday. Not exciting, I know, but I was happy. And they weren't nearly as bad as I thought, and some big yucky stains in the dining room came up great. Now I know when they've been done, and we hired a local Howell company to do it, which makes me feel good. The tech was very nice and he was in and out in 2 and a half hours for the whole house. Not bad! And the price wasn't too bad either!

2) I do not have an update on the 19 year old marrying the 75 year old guy situation. I asked my parents when we were up there for Tim Brown's open house last weekend, and they haven't heard anything. I am dying of curiosity!

3) I've been working and working again, which is fine. Money is nice. I was supposed to have two weeks off at the beginning of the month, and it ended up being shortened. There's not much in August yet from what I hear. Miss April, I want to come out and see you or have you come and visit the house again! I know you didn't get to see much when you came for my party! And thanks again for coming, I'm so glad you did.

4) We leave on Wednesday for our trip up north. Very excited! I got Brian a new camera for our anniversary/his birthday, so there may be good pics to post! And the campsite and inn both have wi-fi, so they may be up quickly, if we get around to it!

5) I've also had a request to take pics of the house for my friend Miss Laura (Newly engaged! Congrats!) out in California so she can see the house. She's asked me to post them here. I'll try to do that, so sorry I haven't yet!

6) Finally, just a quick update on baby stuff. In a nutshell, there is no update. The more intervention we try, the less pregnant I get. I do not expect that I can put myself through this crap much longer. Brian is getting tired of it too, and he's not even the one getting poked and prodded and on medicine all the time. So, we may stop this pursuit soon and move on to building our family in another way. I am very excited about that prospect!

Fourth of July Weirdness

So, I know I posted this a little on FB, but I must elaborate on the the weirdness at my parents' house on the Fourth of July.

First off, its really true that Brian and I were REALLY out of place. We were completely surrounded by 17 year olds and 70 year olds. Grant had a ton of people there, probably 20 teenage kids, some who seemed nice and some who were annoying, as many teenagers are! I can't get over how old these teenage girls look now--is 15 the new 25? Good lord, those girls are more made up and put together than I am now at 30. What happened to braces and pimply faces? For those of you who read this who knew me in high school, we DID NOT look like that 12 or so years ago.

As for the 70 year olds, my parents friends seem to be aging at a rapid rate of acceleration--a few short years ago, it seems their friends were their age. Now, it seems that they have about 2 friends their own age, and the rest are all literally senior citizens, which my parents are not. So, Brian ended up hanging out with my cousin Cory all night (age 21, and he even felt old next to the kids) and I talked to my mom and grandma, and hung out with Brian and Cory. And Holly and Denny later when they came over! Holly did not bring the kids, which was probably for the best, and so Emily got to stay at home with her Grandpa Jim (Holly's dad), who she proudly informed her mother is her "BFF." Where the heck does a 3 and a half year old learn BFF???

Finally, we get to the part I know many of you are wondering about....the 75 year old marrying the 19 year old. Here is the story. This guy Ron has been a friend of my parents for a long time. He's also done a ton of carpentry/building work for them, which is his forte and he's very good at it. I guess a few years ago he bought a house in the UP up by the Soo and began spending summers up there, working and enjoying himself (For a 75 year old, this guy looks like a healthy 60 year old and could outwork any of his reading or writing this blog!). Across the street lived this family of a single dad with 3 kids, mom took off to Ohio. I guess they are kind of wacky religious, and the kids, especially the 2 girls, are not allowed to talk to anybody not approved by the dad. They've been homeschooled, haven't had jobs, etc. These people are also really poor, and Ron would frequently raid my mother's garden for all sorts of stuff to take up to them so they'd have food. Well, this girl starting hanging around Ron, and dad let it go, probably thinking he was harmless. When he came back down to Mayville for the winter, she kept calling him and calling him. He would pick and talk to her, partially to not be rude but I'm also sure he enjoyed the attention. He claims that he told her repeatedly to go get a boyfriend her own age, to no avail. Well, the absent mom comes in the picture and tells Ron to quit talking to her daughter, etc, and his response is "She's been calling ME, all I do is pick up the phone." Fast forward to this summer, and they are apparently getting married this week, and might be already as I write this blog. When I saw them at the party, I seriously thought it was his cute little granddaughter, until Jim tells us all otherwise, and my Mom confirmed the story. We totally thought he was pulling our leg, but no. Obviously, this girl sees this as her way out, and I'm sure Ron enjoys having a cute young girl on his arm. If everyone is going into it with eyes open, not my business.....but I was grossed out a second time when Jim wondered out loud if the girl might be pregnant.....

Where the hell did June go?

Um, so 2 weeks have passed since I last blogged. I have no idea where the hell the month went since my party. I've just been very very busy! Not much to report on this last day of June. I'm happy Candace and Oliver are coming back tonight, as I'm now off on break from work for 2 weeks and desperately want to hang out! I think we may go to the Zoo, hang out at the pool, etc. I'm excited. I'm also very excited that Brian and I are going up north for a few days at the end of July, beginning of August. We're camping in Grand Marais with my aunt, uncle and cousins, and then heading to Houghton/Hancock for a few days to see my friend Mary and drive up to Copper Harbor! Fun! This coming weekend is the Fourth of July, with my mother's yearly party that Brian and I have never actually attended together. We've always had other plans! So this year, that's it. I feel like so many things are going on, before I know it, fall will be here and I'll have missed the summer totally. We have the Kid Rock show to go to in a few weeks, and Jimmy Buffett in August, after Brian goes camping. We're so busy, its crazy! I hope to talk to everyone soon!

They Say It's My Birthday!

So, sorry it took me so long to do a recap of my par-tay. Sunday was spent cleaning up and sleeping, and I've worked a ton Monday, yesterday, and today. So, for those of you who weren't there, or who haven't heard the whole BB gun story, here goes!

Brian and our friend Paul did sooooo much prep on Friday night. Brian had said it would be a couple hours, and it ended up being 7 hours. I was so stressed out. Paul was at our house until almost 1 am. I felt really bad that we kept him away from Marcy and Merina for that long. And he was back at the house at 11 am Saturday morning. It was crazy. Also, my kitchen was COMPLETELY trashed and Brian kept assuring me that he would clean it up before everyone got there, which I knew was completely impossible, which stressed me out even more. So, Grant and I ended up cleaning when Tim and Brian went to go the get the keg and go to GFS. I was going totally nuts. The weather also had me nuts, as it rained the whole morning before the party started, and despite the fact we had a tent, I did NOT want people to have to sit out in the rain. That totally sucks.

So, the party started on time, and guests started arriving, which is always the fun part. The preparation leading up to the party is always the worst for me--the party itself is fun, because I enjoy seeing everyone. It was very good to see family, as always, and I particularly appreciate friends that came from far out of town, like Kate and Paul, April and JB, and Tom and Mer. (Another shout out Miss A!) I was in the kitchen when Kate and Paul arrived, and suddenly I turned around and there was Paul, and I screamed like a teenage girl. I asked where Kate was, and Paul said she was coming in. Well, I sprinted for the door, flung it open, and there she was. I again screamed like a little girl, and then tackled her so hard her beer went flying onto my laundry room floor. Hell, that's why it's tiled right? I was also thrilled when April and JB arrived with Miss Olivia, and later on when Tom and Mer came. I'm also obviously always happy to see Holly and the kids and Candace and Ollie! I was also happy to meet Kelly and Shawn's new baby, Aiden.

The party went well, the pig was great. My mom was nice enough to carve it up for Brian, and a few of the kids found it very fascinating that the pig had a face. Some of the adults were simultaneously grossed out by that fact. The food that Brian and Paul made was great, and there were ample drinks. We actually ended up having TONS of the side dishes left over, so much so that my mom and Holly each took several trays home, and we have 3 or 4 in the freezer. Later on in the day, the family took off and it was all of us and our friends, which was fun. We FINALLY cut Marcy's awesome birthday cake, which was round and looked like a beach, with an umbrella, beach shoes, towels, etc, all that were edible. It was awesome and people loved it!

Okay, so here's the deal with the BB guns. Earlier in the day, my neighbor had come around and warned us that kids were riding around the sub in a golf cart shooting BB guns. Not cool. So, we had some warning of what was going on. About 9 pm, Brian and a bunch of our friends were in the garage hanging out, and I was inside, when all of a sudden, BB's starting being fired into our garage. Grady and Laura got hit, but they are okay. Brian and a bunch of our friends took off through the woods and across the fields to the kids' house, which is a farm house behind our sub. They found the kids with their parents, and a few friends that they had over. The exchanges were heated at first, until Brian calmed people down and the guys presented evidence that it had, in fact, been those boys who did the shooting. The dad proceeded to smash the BB guns and the mom freaked out when she found out there had been roughly 30 little kids running around all day. Brian and the guys came back to the house, and a bit later, we ended up calling the cops to report it. The State boys came out and talked to us, and went to the boys house, and they got stern talking to. Sunday night, they came to our door with their dad and apologized again, and we all had a discussion. I think the cops scared the crap out of those kids, and I think they've hopefully learned the lesson. I don't think we'll be seeing them around the sub again.

So that's what went down! To all of you that attended, thanks for coming, and for those who couldn't come, I wish you'd been able to!

Celebrate Good Times Come On!

Okay, so I realized the other day I haven't written in my bloggedy-blog for about 2 weeks. I fell off the wagon! I had a few minutes before I start work this morning, so decided to talk about my party that's coming up!

My birthday's on Saturday! I'm so excited! I hope everyone's coming and the weather stays nice and we all have a good time. Brian has done a good job getting things organized, everything is mostly bought and the few things that aren't will get taken care of Friday. He took the day off work to party prep and the boys are coming down with the dead pig to stay the night. They'll start that pig first thing on Saturday morning! There is going to be plenty of food and drink for everyone. There's going to be the pig, obviously, and all the sides. Baked beans, hawaiian rice, 2 kinds of potatoes, fruit salad, (among others) and 4 different kinds of sauces for the pig. And Marcy is making me a cool luau themed cake. We rented a tent and tables. Our friend Chad is not going to be able to DJ as he had thought about doing, as he has to be out of town for a family party, but we'll have music outside, I'm sure. Brian reserved a keg of Labatt's Blue Light, and we have alcohol to make big containers of mai tais. We also have plenty of pop, water, and juice for the kids.

So, come one, come all, to the best party around! Can't wait to see some of my friends whom I haven't seen in a awhile, including frequent reader Miss April, and my friends from South Bend Kate and Paul (aka Katers and Paolo). And of course I'm always happy to see all my family and friends, and Brian loves throwing a party, so this was a great excuse!

See you all there, gotta go, work is starting!

Visits, Yard Work, Party Planning and Fenderbenders

Boy, the title to this post just about says it all regarding what's been going on with me lately. Here's a quick rundown, giving some more details!

1) This past weekend I drove to Gladwin and visited my old friend Mary at her home there. She and her baby were down from Hancock (in the UP, where Michigan Tech is) having a huge garage sale and getting their house ready to sell. It was so good to see Mary again, as we had sort of fallen out of touch since before I met Brian. She was having some stuff go on in her personal life, I was busy with law school, and she and Ted moved to Gladwin, so it just sort of happened. We reconnected via Facebook (the only person I've reconnected with on FB that I'm really happy about.) Mary is the same old Mary, in a good way. Still the most bad ass chick I've ever met, even as the mother of a super cute daughter named Elaine. I'm so glad to be back in touch with her.

2) Brian and I remulched the front of the house yesterday. It took 6 yards of mulch and it wasn't quite enough. We'll have to go get a few bags to finish it up, but all in all, it looks really good again. We did it a lot thicker this year than last year, and it is much better that way. Brian worked really hard, much harder than me, and deserves praise (which he got).

3) We've been working hard to get the final details of the party planned out. Tent ordered, drinks planned, plates and stuff mostly purchased. Headcount is mostly complete. Can't wait to see everyone!

4) Today on my way home from seeing Candace and Oliver, I went to Meijer to get groceries on the way home. As I was leaving, I carefully looked around and proceeded to back out of my spot, at the same time a crazy middle aged lady in a Chevy Impala who had passed behind me proceeded to slam on the brakes and back up at about 30 miles an hour to get that spot that's all of 5 feet closer to the store. And you know, in the process, backs right into me. Gee thanks. I probably need a new bumper. It's not that bad, but the way cars are built now, they have to replace the whole damn bumper for a minor injury. Argh! Just trust me when I say that this was not my day. It was sort of a rough morning, for reasons I'll keep private.

More updates later!

Fainting Update!

Miss April specifically asked me and others might be interested, so here's an update on what's up with my fainting.

Basically, I took some tests last Friday, namely a glucose tolerance test and a full thyroid panel. The thyroid panel was actually at my request, just to check it. My TSH is normal, but I've never had the full panel done, and thyroid issues can cause miscarriages and other problems, so for my peace of mind, I asked for it. My doctor is so cool, she had no issue with me asking and added the tests to my lab order. Of course she's cool, she went to Western too! (And she's only 2 years older than I am!).

My test results came in on Tuesday. And the grand verdict is..........There is nothing wrong with me! My sugar was normal and so was the thyroid. Apparently, I just like to faint for no reason. She said at this point, she didn't need to see me, and advised me to make sure I eat regularly (not a problem) and to eat more protein and less sugar (will be a challenge, as sugar is my favorite food group). She said if it happens again, come see her immediately, as there are other, more invasive things she can check me for (like heart stuff, etc). I did have an EKG in the ER, which came out normal. So, I guess, sometimes people just faint.

Also, just thought I'd throw in here that my dog bite bruise is healing well and looks a lot less gross. And I finally fixed my torn pants. But I'm really disappointed the owners of the dog never came to see me after their vacation, like they promised they would. The next time I ride by their house (very cautiously, I might add), if I see them, I'm going to stop and call them out on it.

That's all for now. Bye all!

Stress and Humiliation!

Okay, so most of you have heard this story already, but I'll tell it here in case anybody didn't and want to read the details.

As many of you know, Brian had to be gone for work since last Wednesday. He just got home today. I was by myself last weekend, doing fine, and on Sunday morning, it was totally gorgeous, so I decided to take my first bike ride of the season. I rode north up hacker Road and turned onto some dirt roads to take the route I typically take. I turned north onto Kellogg Road and was planning on riding all the way up to M-59 if I could (that's about 10 miles round trip). Well, I'm enjoying my ride and I came up a certain house I've ridden by every time on this route, probably 50 times (I ride my bike a lot in the summer). These people have horses and the pen is really close to the road, so I always make noises at the horses, and say hi to them, as I ride by. These folks also have dogs--3 of them. One is an old female yellow lab who tries to lick me to death, and the other two are German Wirehaired Pointers that are normally in a pen. I've vaguely noticed them before, they would bark at me, but not threateningly. I never thought the dogs were vicious.

So, last Sunday, I'm riding by the house, and make my normal horse-greeting noises, thinking nothing of it. Well, the two Pointers were NOT in their pen and they came after me as I rode by. They started barking and barking and ran right next to me. I obviously freaked out, and started pedaling harder, hoping they would fall back. They did not, and the female tried to take a chunk out of my leg. When I felt teeth, I started screaming. A woman ran out of the house and screamed at them, and the dogs let go of me, and she put them in their pen. She then starting profusely apologizing, asking me if I was okay, if I wanted her to call the police, etc. I looked down at my pants and they were ripped in 3 places. I lifted my pant leg, and my leg was bruised to hell and the skin had been broken, but not badly.

Anyway, the owners are out of town, and the woman that helped me was the housesitter. I decided she didn't need to call the cops, as I wasn't injured that seriously. And she was able to provide me immediate proof that the dogs were vaccinated. So, I let it go at that (the owners have called me and are going to visit the house when they get back from vacation).

Later, I had plans to go to dinner with a friend at the Olive Garden on Novi Road. We met at 6:30 and had a very nice dinner and had hung out about 2 hours at that point when she was going to order dessert. All of a sudden, I felt very very hot, and she told me to go get some air. At that point, I knew I couldn't, I would fall down trying to get outside. The next thing I know, I'm passed out in my chair. I'm not sure if I actually ever totally lost consciousness, because I was somewhat aware of what was going on around me, and could be somewhat responsive at times. But, to me, it felt like about a minute or two, but my friend tells me I was out of it 5 or 10 minutes. By the time I came to, the ambulance crew was getting there. It was so embarrassing to be taken out of the freaking Olive Garden on a stretcher. The EMTs insisted, even though by that point, I pretty much felt fine. Also, I scared a whole table full of children.

So, they took me to the ER at Providence Park about 3 miles away. Of course, the EMTs and all the ER staff had to ask me my medical history, so I had to get into my history of miscarriages, etc. Then, they would ask me if I was pregnant, and I'd say no, and tell them exactly how I knew that. I had to repeat all this about 5 times. They then started talking about blood clots, and I had to explain the MTHFR thing 5 times and no one had ever heard of it, and I think they thought I was nuts. So, the blood clot test they ran came back slightly elevated, so they had to check me for a pulmonary embolism. I had a CT scan of my chest, which came up totally normal. I finally got to go home after 3 and half hours. They didn't really find much, and recommended I follow up with my family doctor. I am, and am having some more testing tomorrow. Hopefully, they find something so I can prevent this from happening again. That was the most embarrassing thing to happen to me ever.

Weekend at the Pocono's (Not Bernie's)

Again, it's been a while since I blogged. Once the document review project ended, I went right back into deps. And last weekend, we went to the Poconos Mountains in Pennsylvania for my Aunt Marcia's 50th Birthday party. All she wanted was her family and friends at the cabin for a party, and that's what she got! My grandparents were there at their cabin, my cousin Kim (Aunt Marcia's daughter) and her husband and baby were there, my uncle Marty, aunt Margaret and cousins Emma and Nolan came, and Aunt Holli and Cory and Kayla came. Uncle Mark couldn't go for work reasons. My parents are the only ones who didn't go from our side of the family, and people were pretty disappointed with them as they really didn't have a good excuse. (I can say that without starting stuff in the family because they don't read this.)

We flew out on Friday, and ended up getting delayed out of Detroit for 2 hours. We finally left at 2:30 and landed in Newark, New Jersey, right during rush hour. Of course, just our luck. A 2 hour drive turned into 3. We finally made it to the mountains at 7 o'clock. She and my uncle, and my grandparents own cabins in a small mountain development in Greentown, Pennsylvania. Well, my grandparents place is a trailer, as are many of the places in this development. My aunt and uncle's place is a real cabin, and my uncle has done a ton of work on it. It's pretty sweet.

I must say, we were lucky this weekend that we flew. Because of that, we were unable to bring pillows and air mattresses like many other people did, so we scored a real bed at Grandpa and Grandmas. However, that bed is the WORST bed I've ever slept on (not to sound ungrateful). But it is super hard and super uncomfortable. Not that Brian was in the bed with me that much! Friday, he was up with my cousin's husband and other dudes until about 2 am, and we were up at 7. Saturday was the day of the party, and it was rocking. This side of my family are my "drinking" relatives, and my cousin Kayla was in awe at the amount of alcohol. The party itself was in the pole barn of friends of my aunt and uncle, and it worked out really well, except for there being no bathroom. You had to hike up and down a big old hill to get to the nearest bathroom! Let's just say the guys didn't bother with the hike! The party was great and went on and on, and I gave it up at about 10 because I was tired from not getting a ton of sleep the night before, but Brian didn't come to bed until 3 am.

We were both utterly exhausted the next day going home, and felt like crap. We ended up stopping at a Wendy's in New Jersey about 45 minutes out of Newark, and it was a great idea. We felt SO much better afterward, and made it home without incident, thank god. And then Brian left Monday, came home Tuesday, and left again Wednesday! And he's gone for a week, even over the weekend. And that's what going on with us the last few weeks!

Little Me

The reason I haven't blogged in almost two weeks is that I have been super busy working again. This is very good--money is nice. The assignment I'm on right now is a document review project at a firm in Bloomfield Hills, so the drive is long. The hours are also kind of long, so by the time I've been getting home at night, I've been pretty damn tired. Thus, no blogging.

However, our work got canceled this weekend due to the illness of the lead attorney, so I actually find myself with a few moments to do an entry I've been wanting to do. When Brian and I went to my parents' for Easter, my grandmother came in the house and said that she'd been going through some boxes of stuff that had belonged to her mom, my great grandmother, Grandma Anderson. Grandma Anderson died in the spring of my last year in college. Grandma Anderson was famous for two things: her prolific smoking habit, and the handmade sweaters she made EVERYBODY for Christmas EVERY SINGLE year. Now, as a kid, I hated sweaters, and didn't really appreciate the gifts she made me. However, if she were alive today, I would want about 20 of those things. I do have the last thing she ever made me, which was a hand knit toiletry bag. I use it every single time I go somewhere.

So, anyway, Grandma Sharon was going through the boxes and ran across a picture. It's the picture shown above. On the back, in Grandma Anderson's very recognizable old fashioned handwriting, it says "1983." That would make me 4 years old in this photo. However, I have a feeling its really from 1984, because this is clearly a school picture, and I never went to preschool. So, I strongly feel like this is my Kindergarten school picture. Look at little me! I'm so cute, although I wish my pigtails were neater in this photo!

I have to say its really nice to have a picture of myself from when I was little. When my parents got divorced, my father was a total asshole (big shock) and destroyed all the pictures and photo albums my mom had of me and my older brother. So, there are no pictures of me left that I'm aware of me as a baby or small child. So, it's really nice to have this one. Also, I have to say I distinctly remember the sweater I'm wearing in this picture. I remember being little and looking down at myself and seeing the flowers that are all over it. I remember not liking wearing the sweater, because, as I said, I hated sweaters, but also because it was, in particular, a turtleneck (which I still hate). However, I'd give anything to have one of those sweaters now. And also, a few more pics of myself as a little kid.

"The Business of Being Born"

I have to tell everyone that yesterday Candace and I watched this movie called "The Business of Being Born." It is a documentary made by Ricki Lake (yes, that Ricki Lake) after having her first son in the hospital and having what she calls a "dissatisfying" experience. After having her first son, she got really into this natural, homebirth thing, and in this movie, it actually shows her giving birth to her second son at home, in a bath tub.

I was nervous to watch this movie, as I thought the birth scenes would freak me out. In reality, the birth scenes were not as freaky as I thought it would be. The issue I have with this movie is that it clearly is made from one point of view--the anti-OB, anti-hospital birth point of view. It makes out EVERY hospital to be bad and every OB out like they just want to do C-sections all the time, etc. It also makes it seem like all women's experiences with birth in the hospital as bad or traumatic for them somehow, and presents home birth as the ONLY way to solve this problem. I mean, the scenes showing actual births in homes were depicted as almost orgasmic when the child was coming out. Seriously, the sounds the women were making sounded like porn. Good for those women that they can do that without drugs, but I simply don't think its realistic for many women. I know the argument is that all women used to give birth at home with no intervention, and my response to that is, "Yeah, that's when women used to die in labor and delivery."

Candace and I discussed this after, and we agreed that the movie makes valid points about the state of maternal health care in this country. For example, I do think hospitals and OBs, in general, do too many interventions. They are too quick to give Pitocin if things aren't moving along, they are quick to do C-sections if there is any distress (and fetal distress during a birth is common and not necessarily alarming). Hospitals want you in and out as soon as possible. Further, its an excellent point that the "laying on your back" position they make you do in the hospital is the WORST one for giving birth--you should theoretically be up and letting gravity help. However, you cannot do this if you do get an epidural, which I strongly believe should be kept widely available. Finally, the cost argument was a good one--a normal vaginal delivery in a hospital can cost $13,000. A home birth with a midwife, about $4,000. C sections cost even more, and now 1 in 3 women have a C-section. That is twice what is medically necessary, and it seems that docs down play the risk of complication from C section. It is real and it's scary, particularly with every repeat C section you have. However, this doesn't mean that 90% of women should give birth at home, or would even want to. For example, if I'm laboring at home and something bad happens--it would take a good 20-25 minutes for me to get to the hospital. In that time, something very bad could happen to me or my baby (if I ever have one). That is scary to me. And Candace stated the she doesn't consider her birth of Oliver in the hospital to have been traumatic, and I think neither do any of the women I know, so that shoots one of their arguments in the foot.

Candace and I agreed that we wished there could be some middle ground between the two sides of this debate. Like truly changing the mind set of OBs and patients that we will do as few interventions as possible and let a woman labor a long time if necessary. The problem is that OBs think midwives are crazy and midwives hate OBs, typically. So, I do think some good can come from this movie. I will say that last week I read an article in the New York Tomes online that sort of followed up this movie (I read the article before I saw the movie). It talks to some VERY dissatisfied patients of this midwife named Kara who is featured prominently in the film. She has had some very bad results that are not discussed in the film, and when things go wrong, she pretty much just dumps people at the hospital with no explanation to the medical staff there. Hospitals in the area of New York where she practices do not like her. So, that was interesting.

Anyway, I would recommend that if you watch the movie, keep in mind its from one point of view. Watch it, and form your own opinions. It was actually pretty interesting.

Proud Godmother

As I stated on Facebook, I am now a proud Godmother to Jeff and Candace's son, Oliver. His baptism was yesterday down in Canton, really close to our old house (which was kind of weird). Anyway, Brian was asked to be his godfather as well, which was really wonderful. We feel very honored to be asked to play an important role in his life.

Three children were being baptized yesterday, Ollie, a little girl about his age (6 months) and a tiny baby girl. All the families sat around the fount (the bird bath looking thing with the holy water in it) in a half circle. We were in the middle. Anyway, I've never been to a Catholic baptism before (just my friend K-Lo's very cool Mennonite baptism), so I had no clue what to do. But, the deacon was very nice and guided us through. Ollie was very cute in his little outfit, and behaved like a champ. When the deacon annointed his chest with oil, Ollie tried to bite his thumb. When the holy water was dumped on his head, he just had this startled look on his face, then when it was done, he squealed. And when his head was annointed with the other oil, he, again, just let out a squeal. Afterwards, there were many pictures taken, so I was careful yesterday to make sure I had good makeup and hair going so I'd look my best for Candace's pictures! Brian also looked snazzy in his blue button down and sport jacket. My husband is CUTE.

After the ceremony, we went to Jeff's parents' house for a family party. The men spent most of their time watching the State game (go MSU!). The ladies sat around and chatted (mostly about babies and kids) and Candace opened Ollie's gifts. You know, a typical family style party. The food and cake were delicious, and we appreciate the Meese's having us in their home. Again, we truly appreciate and are honored by the fact that we were asked to have that role in Oliver's life.

As a side note, Brian was completely in his element yesterday at the church and during the ceremony. Me not being Catholic (or anything, really) I had no idea what to expect, and it was a cake walk for him. He knew every prayer and exactly what to do and obviously felt really comfortable. It's strange for me to see him in that light, because he's never really gone to Mass or been involved in his church the entire time we've been together. But its the same feeling I get when we travel together and we go in cathedrals, and he stops and crosses himself in the holy water. It's weird for me, but natural for him. So, quite honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he becomes a church goer again...

Nada, Zippo, Zilch

Since we've gotten back from Florida, I've had nada, zippo, zilch to do. Especially this week. Work is slow, slow, slow, the house is clean, and it's not exactly warm enough to do real yard work yet. I wish I had actual, paying work to do, but, alas, no. Which, quite frankly, I do not understand.

Almost two weeks ago, I had this big phone call with the head partner, in which he proceeded to tell me how busy they are, and they have "125 hours a month of research and writing work for me to do, if I want it." Then, he proceeds to state, "We don't really care about your personal situation nor do we need to know what it is, we just need to know if you want to work, and if so how much." (They don't even know what my personal situation is, for pity's sake. All they know is that I had to have some time off. Way to be a jerk.) He told me to take some time and think about it, and get back to them. The very next day, I emailed him and the other attorney I deal with a lot and told them specifically that I was ready and able to work, and exactly how much work I was wanting. Since they were so busy, I was thinking I'd get work last week.

Nope. As I said earlier, nada, zippo, zilch. Earlier today, I sent them a very nice email, checking status. I have not heard back yet. It's really frustrating. If they've decided they don't want to "deal with me" anymore because of my "personal situation," fine, whatever. If that's the case, just let me know so I can move on. If not, give a girl some damn work! I'm starting to wish I had just gotten a job in retail when we moved out here a year and a half ago, but oh well. And the sucky thing is that those jobs are all filled right now because retail is so bad! So I'm a bit stuck!

I'll keep you up on what's going on. But until then, I guess I'll go continue reading "Atlas Shrugged."

No Needles for Me, No Sir

Brian and I had another appointment today at the special baby making doctor's office. Before we went on vacation, I had several tests run, and I just needed in my own head to talk it through with the doc a little more before we jumped back into anything. All the tests he had run turned out well, which makes things even more frustrating (trust me, when you deal with a situation like this, you want them to find something wrong, just so you have some certainty). I know I talked a bit in a previous post about heparin, which is a blood thinner. The doc doesn't think I need it, but I sort of think I do. And that's what I wanted to talk about today a little more.

We started off first discussing why he wants to give me Clomid (which stimulates the ovaries) when I have no flipping trouble getting pregnant. He stated the Clomid would be to optimize conditions at ovulation, keeping good hormone levels high, and making things best as possible for embryo implantation. But he also said, if I don't want to do it, its my choice. He feels its just one thing that may up my chances a little and won't hurt (other than slightly increasing my chances of having twins--they do monitor you to help prevent that). Okay, I understand that, and I totally appreciate the fact that he's not pushing it.

Then, we moved on to discussing heparin, the blood thinner shots. Again, certain enzyme levels I have are good, and my clotting times are good, which would indicate that I don't need the heparin despite having the gene mutation. However, its hard to trust what's being told to you when you have numerous women on message boards telling you that you "absolutely have to have it and I cannot believe your doctor will not give it to you! Mine gave it to me without question! I would absolutely get a second opinion!" We discussed this at length.

I asked him if he doesn't feel I need it and neither do a lot of other women, why are so many doctors giving it to their patients? He stated that 1) he feels that many doctors just don't understand the literature regarding its usefulness, or in his opinion, lack thereof 2) many women are given it simply to shut them up (i.e., the squeaky wheel gets oiled) and 3) the risk of complications from it is relatively low, so a lot of people use it just for the hell of it. Here are my feelings on those responses. 1) This doc is really smart, and really seems like he knows what he's doing, so I can believe that--people can read medical literature in whatever way they want to suit their agenda. 2) I can also buy that argument--that a doc would give somebody a drug just to shut them up and make them go away. 3) Even going in there as a patient asking for it, I understand the risk is small, but real, so I appreciate that the doc's priority is to see no harm comes to me. He also said that if I did get pregnant and any test result came back weird or anything happened that made him think heparin would be helpful, he would certainly prescribe it then. It's something that you only need once you're pregnant, typically.

Also, I have noticed increased bruising just from being on the baby aspirin I'm on, so it does make me nervous to use the heparin. I gave myself a horrible bruise lately simply banging my leg on a stadium seat in Florida--this thing is the size of a softball and will probably take several weeks to heal. And it didn't even hurt very much when I did it, at the time I thought nothing of it. That is another indication that I 1) have thin enough blood as it is and don't need the heparin and 2) giving me the heparin could be potentially very dangerous. If I were on the heparin and did that to myself, I could possibly bleed out and die. Seriously. I mean that risk is very, very small, but I specifically asked Brian if it would be worth it to him, and he said no. The doc said he'd give it to me if I insisted, but that huge bruise freaks me out big time. So, I think I probably won't do it. I guess in the end, I'd rather be alive than have a baby.

So, that's what up. The doc said take some time and figure out what we want to do and when, and then give him a call. He also said that if we did decide on adoption instead, they could help us with resources. He, himself, is on an advisory board that helps encourage adoption. So, if that's the route we take, we have a little help there too (on top of all the other help that friends have offered). Honestly, I can't do this many more times, so fairly soon, this will be over one way or the other (either we have a baby, or I have another loss and we move on for good). That'll be the day I hope for--when our lives are back to normal and all this bullshit is done.